Bawdy Drinking Toasts

I attended another FELD (and former FELD) happy evening last night after work, and I had the opportunity to learn a great new toast from Hunter:

Here's to being single, seeing double, and sleeping triple.

So in honor of that, since there aren't many good bawdy toasts on the Internet(s) (I Googled for hours for Bar Golf 2004 with little success) I thought I would share some others I've collected over the years:

A solider's home is the land, a sailor's home is the sea, but a whisky glass and a hooker's ass is home, sweet home to me.

Here's to the girl with the little red shoes -- she smoked my pot, she drank my booze. She lost her cherry, but that's not a sin 'cause she still has the box that the cherry came in.

I'm not a heavy drinker -- I have one or two at the most. After one I'm under the table, after two I'm under the host.

Here's to birthdays. Birthday's only come once a year. Aren't you glad you're not a birthday?

To lesbians and virgins -- thanks for nothing.