Return to London: 10/8-10/12

Why?

* I haven't been since Spring of 2005.

* My favorite club, Fabric, opened a new club at the O2 arena called matter.

* Flight + hotel was cheap ($300 less on Orbitz than booking on the airline and hotel sites separately).

* A break from the political news cycle, and CSPAN overload.

* Because I can.

Vacation

Almost two years to the day, I can't fucking decide where to go on vacation.

Since I'm still in school, there are only a few times I can travel: spring break, intercession (2-3 weeks in May between spring and summer term), and after I finish in August. I haven't taken a real vacation since 2005, so the sooner the better.

London always pops to the top of the list, but I don't think I'll have enough time off to do all the things I want there. Besides, the USD -> GBP exchange rate is hateful.

I toyed with going to Los Angeles for some clubbing, possibly some Disney bullshit.

Thanks to iTunes, I think I've made up my mind. I want to take a vacation to 1994.

Williamsburg, VA

Back when I was a Madrigal Singer in April of 1996, we performed at Bruton Parish Church in Colonial Williamsburg.



Since I couldn't get a hotel in NYC at the last minute I had not been there in years, I decided to spend Columbus Day Weekend there.

Friday

---

• Stayed at Crowne Plaza, which allows pets. Too bad I don't have a puppy.


• Dinner at The Trellis, one of the best meals I've ever eaten


• I sent text messages to all the former W&M alum I could think of to find out where the best night spot was in Williamsburg. Billy's answer: Paul's. Despite getting a Guinness in a plastic cup (and a single pour), this college bar provided lots of wonderful young flesh to gawk at.

Saturday

---

• Lunch at The Sportsman Grille. Service: D-, Food: D+


• Drank tasty Pumpkin Ale at The Tap House Grill At Ghent in Norfolk, VA


• Hooray bar-hopping trannies! Took photographs of Corey with said trannies

(Miss Angel on the left, Corey and his goatee in center, and Miss Diana on the right):


Sunday

---

• Breakfast at a random pancake house. Hit the spot.


• Went to Busch Gardens, which is running their Howl-o-Scream...whatever it is.



• While in line and being attacked from teenage werewolves, I see my new hero: Daddy Juice Pig:
  
  Daddy Juice Pig was there with his little (maybe 8 years old) son. Complete with b-acne and swollen forehead, he proved that it's never to early to show your children how important performance enhancing drugs can be.


• Dinner and drinks at Paul's (Yum!)

Monday

---

• Another pancake house breakfast


• Visited Jamestown, took pictures, and most-of-all: sweated. Everything there is basically a 100 year old recreation of its former, 400 year old self.

Restful, relaxing, and out of my system.

"Did you win big in Atlantic City?"

Overall, it was a good trip to Atlantic City. Saturday night it was packed, and I ended up down $300. Sunday I put in another $200 (I was playing off Andrew's marker) and played that up for $1400. I payed Andrew back the $500 I borrowed and then managed to turn $900 back into $0.

Which is when I officially declared gambling activities were over.

Hotel was nice, food was spectacular, the people were fucking mental patients.

Overall: excellent trip.

Old friends, big plans, fat ass, new haunts, huge hangover

In the way back machine (circa 1989), Margaret [photo far right] and I made up the entire lower-brass section in band. We had a strange connection growing up (besides the time she made me do push ups in Jazz Band as a token of my undying affection). Our parent's phone numbers were identical (except the last two numbers transposed). Her mother and my aunt were roommates in college. Her dad was my gym coach in 5th and 6th grade, then again (through a fluke) in 9th and 10th grades.

I got a Facebook invitation from Margaret that her band (TV/TV) was playing Saturday (3/10/2007) Fat Baby, just a block from Teany. I already had plans for a long weekend in New York after spring break, so I decided to switch my trip to see her show.

Mike H., another friend from high school, also lives in New York. I visited him one weekend during DJ school in December 2005, and we stay in touch. I planned to give him a heads-up about this trip, but ended up switching the dates and forgot. I sent him a text message from Ellis Island Saturday afternoon that I was going to Margaret's party at 9:00pm (EST). I found out from Margaret during the day that her parents would be there also (my aunt's college roommate and my junior high and high school gym coach).

Mike met me in front, and we caught the end of TV/TV's set. For me, the highlight of the evening was talking to Margaret's dad, Coach L. Mike was talking to him when I walked over, and Mike re-introduced me. He was like, "You're Amy's brother, right?" [Yeah] "Hey you used to be a fat-ass. You must have lost what? A hundred pounds?" Coach and I had a really good conversation, and Mike's comment (to paraphrase) was that Coach L. always was the self-proclaimed expert on all fitness-related matters.

I'm always curious what kind of impression I might have left on people a decade or so ago; I used to be even more sarcastic than I am today, if you can imagine that.

Mike and I wrapped up at Fat Baby and moved on to Banc to meet his sister. Several of his friends joined us, including two guys named Justin. I was told that one was "white Justin" and one was "black Justin", though I preferred "bald Justin" and "follicular Justin". One of Mike's friends fancies himself quite the player, except he was working the ugliest girl in the room. When the Justins pointed it out to me, the first thing out of my mouth was, "Wow...if she blew me in my car I'd be at DMV the next morning getting new license plates. I'd want no way for her to track me down." Gross.

We closed out our tabs and ventured to Brass Monkey in the Meat Packing district. I didn't realize that we were in the Meat Packing district, but as soon as we walked in the door I realized that we were in a meat market.

Sometime around 3:00am (EDT) I called it quits and went back to my hotel. I made sure my clocks were adjusted for DST, set my alarm, and passed out. I woke up three minutes before the alarm at 9:42am in a panic that I had somehow overslept. When I realized that I was fine for time, and the adrenaline dissipated, my hangover smacked me upside the head. Holy pounding head.

Bodies: The Exhibition

I didn't make it to Bodies: The Exhibition on my last trip to New York, so I made it a point to check it out this trip. I think the Wikipedia entry best describes it:

"BODIES... The Exhibition" is a controversial exhibit currently showing in Orlando, New York City, Las Vegas, Miami, Amsterdam, and Seattle (with previous showings in Tampa and other cities) showcasing preserved human bodies dissected to display bodily systems.

The museum is set up so that one starts at the skeletal system, and more layers (muscular, nervous, circulatory, digestive, respiratory, urinary, and reproductive systems; as well as fetal development and the treated body) are added in succesive rooms. Containing about twenty bodies in total, each exhibition uses real human bodies that have been preserved permanently by a process called "polymer preservation" so that they will not decay. This exhibition is organized by the publicly traded corporation, Premier Exhibitions Incorporated.

Some of the specimens are arranged so that they are performing activities such as playing basketball or conducting an orchestra. Along the way are other displays showing a human intestine stretched out, the polluted lung of a smoker, and all of the arteries and veins without the body itself. One section includes several fetuses in various stages of development. All of the fetuses died due to miscarriages.

All of the bodies were either unclaimed, unidentified, or donated to science, and obtained through the Dalian Medical University Plastination Laboratories in China.

Mary saw it with her boyfriend in Las Vegas, and I learned that there was an exhibition in New York City while listening to Opie & Anthony a few weeks ago.

I already knew most of the biology that the you're taught as you walk through the exhibition. What was amazing were the cross sectional exhibits: there is a man whose cut down the middle across his body, and his front skin is separate from his front skeleton, then his organs, then his rear skeleton and his rear skin. Another shows a woman who is cut in half down the middle, and what organs are on the right versus on the left.

Amazing also were the plastinations of blood vessles: in a case were all the arteries and veins of the lungs, liver, arms, legs, kidneys, and entire body. There were all kinds of diseased lungs, hearts, etc. I really liked the preservation of all the fetuses, including those with birth defects. There was one of the abdomen of a woman with the fetus inside. An Arab man and his girlfriend chose to skip that exhibit (as the sign on the wall suggests you consider before moving in that room). The plastinized vaginas looked too much like a pocket pussy.

There is this controversy about where the bodies came from, and how the owner of the exhibition is a for-profit company. The offset to that, which I didn't like, was the preachy way it tries to get you to live better and not be shocked on your own. Next to the diseased lungs is a box where you can throw your cigarettes into. There is a full sized preservation of a big fat woman in cross sections so you can see all her fatty-fatty and think to your fat self "shit, I need to go on a diet". People don't need to be prompted, we know you're a bunch of whores.

At the same time, I went through the whole exhibition in 40 minutes. At $27.50 for adults, I thought it was a little pricey. For a few bucks more, an Asian massage parlor could have given my body an oily exhibition.

Playing Tourist: Statue of Liberty, Ellis Island

DSC01684.JPG, originally uploaded by jweisen.

I was able to tour Ellis Island this trip, unlike in 2004 when my sister wanted to get right back to Battery Park ("I didn't realize we'd be gone this long!" she said after the 30 minute ferry ride to the island).

I learned quite a bit: that the island was originally a fort, that most of its landmass is artificial fill, and that it exemplifies a true government effort: underestimated need, invested huge amounts of money to make it bigger, then it wasn't needed anymore.

Anyway, my pictures are here. Enjoy.

What you see is what you get

On the drive up to NYC, I was passed by a NYC Yellow Cab with Jersey plates. Odd. I also noticed the medallion number on the top and the side was X'ed out with black electrical tape.

As traffic ebbed and flowed, I ended up getting next to this cab and saw the driver was a 60's white/Jewey looking woman with crazy hair and her dachshund in the back of the cab.

...

So you wonder: is this a real cab driver taking a dog someplace? Is this a woman who bought a cab from a NYC cab company after its life as a cab was over? If so, why is she shuttling her tiny little dog around in the back of it like the dog is a passenger?

Science needs to find this woman, and study her.

NYC for the Weekend

I'm off to play tourist.

Two Trips to Teany

One of my favorite places to visit when I'm in New York is Teany, a small cafe owned by Moby. It's nice to take a break from running around to sip a pot of tea and chat with power lesbians about Anna Nichole's death.

Later in the afternoon, I realized I had lost my cell phone at Teany:

Date: Fri, 9 Feb 2007 13:56:27 -0500
From: ransim
To: theAlphaJohn
Subject: Your Cell Phone

You're cell phone is at Teany's, you left if there, I tried to call you and someone called me back from there and wanted me to tell you. Hopefully you get this, not really sure how else to reach you and wasn't sure when you were heading back.

Also I told her if you had left or didn't get it back that you'd call to have them mail it.

-mary

A trip back that evening reunited me with the phone I plan to dump and filled my tummy with the best piece of carrot cake known to man (with some kind of vegan frosting that still made my inner carnivore smile).

I will be sending a thank you letter.

Until our dreams come true, we live on Avenue Q...

I saw Avenue Q for the first time in February 2004, right before they won the Tony Award. I figured it was so funny I'd see it again:

What is AVENUE Q about?

AVENUE Q is the story of Princeton, a bright-eyed college grad who comes to New York City with big dreams and a tiny bank account. He soon discovers that the only neighborhood in his price range is Avenue Q; still, the neighbors seem nice. There's Brian the out-of-work comedian and his therapist fianceé Christmas Eve; Nicky the good-hearted slacker and his roommate Rod -- a Republican investment banker who seems to have some sort of secret; an Internet addict called Trekkie Monster; and a very cute kindergarten teaching assistant named Kate. And would you believe the building's superintendent is Gary Coleman?!? (Yes, that Gary Coleman.) Together, Princeton and his newfound friends struggle to find jobs, dates, and their ever-elusive purpose in life.

Still a fucking riot. I was surprised that it was no where near packed, and on a Friday night.

The Opie and Anthony not-so-walkover

Camping out in the cold is a small price to pay to meet your heros.

Except when they don't show up.

Date: Sat, 10 Feb 2007 19:36:27 -0500
From: theAlphaJohn
To: steve@foundrymusic.com
Subject: Friday's walkover

Steve,

Long time listener in the DC area (when O&A were syndicated on WJFK then had XM for the show's first day back) -- not that it matters. A buddy and I drove up to NYC Thursday night to catch Friday's walkover and completely missed it. One of us was outside CBS and the other was outside the Steinway building by 8:40am and waited until 9:30am but never saw anyone. Just got home tonight and DVR'ed Friday's show on DirecTV, and the show wrapped at CBS at 9 and they were back by 9:15am. What the hell did we miss?

Thanks,
John

Hopefully Steve will write back and let me know what happened...?

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart

I was able to get tickets for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart at the beginning of this week. That's not a huge stretch though, considering that it's really just a ticket to stand in line. None the less, only 2 1/2 hours later I was out of the freezing cold and in the door and laffing and laffing and laffing.

Some interesting things about the taping:

• The "fluffer" is Emmy Award winning writer Paul Mercurio, who happens to be the reason Opie and Anthony were fired for Sex for Sam III in 2001. He does amazing crowd work, very funny.
• Jon actually comes out and answers questions before the show. He took the time to answer every question in the audience.
• There was a story in our taping about the Superbowl commercials, and funny enough was a skit about a robot on the GM assembly line committing suicide. I thought immediately of George.
• The correspondent piece during our episode was about the douche who sued ladies night back in January that Mary sent me.

It was an awesome experience. I need to get on Steven Colbert's show next time I'm up there.

Go North, Young Man

I needed a break, so I'm taking Thursday and Friday off this week for a mini-vacation up to New York City. I'm staying just across the river in Jersey City, and I have quite a bit on the agenda. Let's see how much actually gets accomplished.

Guess where I'm NOT going?? [ed.]

Tuesday August 22nd through Saturday August 26th. I was dicking around this morning and was able to finally cash in my fucking America Airlines miles. Air and hotel is $595 for five days/four nights.

wh00t!

Fucking terrorists.

Vacation (all I ever wanted...)

Since I'm going to be at NVCC this semester, I'm taking my usual spring break vacation from work and hitting the road. So far my thoughts are:

(1) London, with maybe an excursion to Manchester and/or Liverpool
(2) Amsterdam, though not for an entire week
(3) A Eurotrash Adventure, fly into Amsterdam and stay 2 days each in Amsterdam, Brussels, Paris, and London
(4) California, to Los Angeles and/or San Francisco
(5) Skiing (Snow Shoe Perhaps)
(6) A spa/ranch vacation
(7) Watching the first season of The OC on DVD in my underwear

Thoughts?