Liveblogging: Billiam Clinton @ Mason

Joey and Corey joined me in the Johnson Center at George Mason for Bill Clinton's pre-Potomac Primary rally for his cyborg proto-spouse.

8:53 - left class early for the 9:00pm "start". Wait, didn't Bill make 50 nations wait to get food at McDonald's?
8:58 - Billary's staff: HOMELY
9:08 - found a spot to watch, too bad 1,000 sociopathic Asians think it's Chinese New Year, but instead it's ADA and VIPs only
9:15 - speech from campus democrats about how awesome they are for organizing this awesome event in this not-so-awesome venue. The Patriot Center worked for the final four, but not so much for Clinton.
9:43 - somewhere, the 42nd President is loose, and fat coeds are not safe.
9:50 - **cheers** Blah blah Clinton.
9:56 - "my case for Hillary": cute face, chubby waist, thick legs in shape

9:58 - "signing up poor Hispanics to vote"
9:59 - dumb whore falls off chair she's standing on. crowd cheers.
10:00 - "blah blah" something about Israel

10:01 - "you may remember"...no you don't, you were 8 when it happened
10:02 - "you may think NY is a Democratic state"...
10:04 - "last year she passed the student loan blah blah bill"
10:05 - "mortgage meltdown, recession" -- unbelievable!
10:06 - "90 day mortgage review" -- keep the munthly on ma house. booyah!
10:09 - "raise your hand if you know someone without health care", "the only major nation in world without health care". we know, we can buy the congressional health plan. we know 15 million won't want it. they don't have to. PARETO PRINCIPLE!!! everybody must be covered.
10:15 - "we were poorest first family in 20th century", but the booty calls were amazing
10:17 - vote for Hillary. xoxo
10:18 - "number 2 education. free pre-k, death to no child left behind", even though my wife voted for it.

10:18 - how does NCLB work? MORE TESTS FOR EVERYONE!
10:19 - "our kids are smart". amazing considering facebook.
10:20 - "the tests are a wink and a nod", like my marriage. ;) save the music, arts, and other nerd activities. "we are not good at replicating excellence". "5 tests solve nothing", even though my starbucks franchise example makes no sense (they don't franchise).
10:23 - "make college accessible to all. raise pell grants raise hope scholarship. give young people more opportunities through americorps". direct lending.

10:25 - work in a clinic, loans repaid. AIDS pays. hooray.
10:26 - is it happy hour yet?
10:27 - who can we convince to cut their greenhouse gas? green collar high school dropouts. clean -- green -- snogans.
10:29 - bill [hearts] iphone price cuts.
10:30 - other countries hate us? but...but foreign policy?
10:31 - two new nukes for every boy...except iran. nah nah nah nah nah nah!
10:33 - iraq...yawn. it's hot and crowd is thinning. i need Billary pictures.
10:34 - oh dear, big girl panty line. gross.
10:35 - "suppose your neighbors house burned down", wait that doesn't work. let's discuss how used the military is right now. more marines in afghanistan, if i hd them to send.
10:36 - Hil 4 prez == America is BACK! I have a name for my new facebook group.
10:37 - wrapping up, yawn.