The Text Messaging Gods are Concerned by my Absence

That didn't take long.

As previously mentioned, I switched to Verizon last March after breaking a few T-Mobile phones. While I've been pleased with Verizon's service, customer service, and pricing, I fucking hate this phone.

Which isn't a problem anymore, since it shit and died today.

I received a text message from George that I replied to without any trouble, then opened the phone to send a text message and the screen was frozen. I turned the phone off and on, screen still fucked. I took out the battery, screen still fucked.

It lights up, it shows that ugly-ass background I picked, but the screen never updates again.

Since Verizon kindly let me out of my contract, and Cingular/AT&T Wireless updated their list of phones that are eligible for equipment insurance, I ordered a Sony W810i from Amazon. I broke one of my personal rules about signing a 2-year contract, but the cancellation fee is $175 and they're paying me $50 to take the phone. It's cheaper to take the phone and the payoff and give them the finger in a year than to get a 1-year contract.

This also means that Andrew and my parents are no longer free to talk to at any time, but George, Joey, and Mary are. Mike never was, and as long as he's with Sprint he never will be. :p

Two Trips to Teany

One of my favorite places to visit when I'm in New York is Teany, a small cafe owned by Moby. It's nice to take a break from running around to sip a pot of tea and chat with power lesbians about Anna Nichole's death.

Later in the afternoon, I realized I had lost my cell phone at Teany:

Date: Fri, 9 Feb 2007 13:56:27 -0500
From: ransim
To: theAlphaJohn
Subject: Your Cell Phone

You're cell phone is at Teany's, you left if there, I tried to call you and someone called me back from there and wanted me to tell you. Hopefully you get this, not really sure how else to reach you and wasn't sure when you were heading back.

Also I told her if you had left or didn't get it back that you'd call to have them mail it.

-mary

A trip back that evening reunited me with the phone I plan to dump and filled my tummy with the best piece of carrot cake known to man (with some kind of vegan frosting that still made my inner carnivore smile).

I will be sending a thank you letter.

VV Day: Victory over Verizon

Consumerist has been hot on the trail of Verizon since they notified customers of a change to their service agreement. Basically, with or without a text messaging plan, you're going to have to pay for text messages to and from international carriers (which the current plan covers), and the rate for them is going up from $0.10 to $0.15 per message. That means if Guapo in Honduras spams your phone with a text message from Donkey Cellular, you're getting a bill.

Since I love any opportunity to play hardball with the Ivan Seidenberg gestapo, I decided to make an issue of this and see if I could get a better deal on a contract extension. Instead, they rolled over and waived my early termination fee so I can go elsewhere.

Thank you for contacting Verizon Wireless through our website. My name is April, and I am happy to provide you with the details on how to port your number out. However, we value you as a wireless customer, and would like the opportunity to retain your business.

I regret to hear of your decision to cancel your service with Verizon Wireless and port your wireless number to another service provider. In the event that you do chose to port your number out, you will not be billed an Early Termination Fee.

Now that I got exactly what I want, I need to figure out what I'm going to do about it. I mapped out my usage for the past six months:



I keep coming back to the same judgments I made a year ago when I switched to Verizon (in order from best match to worst match):

Selection of phones: 1.) Cingular 2.) T-Mobile 3.) Verizon
Quality of service: 1.) Verizon 2.) Cingular 3.) T-Mobile
Service plans: 1.) T-Mobile 2.) Verizon 3.) Cingular

fucking ::sigh::

I h@x0r3d my new Motorola E815

Verizon disables OBEX profiles on their cell phones, which means bluetooth only works for the headset and you have to use their (for cost) service to transfer files on/off your phone.

I didn't like the prospect of that...not so much.

I checked out a couple websites on how to edit the seem data, Inetron and Nuclear Elephant. Editing the seem requires a special USB data cable from Motorola, so I ordered that off eBay and it arrived yesterday.

I had a few glitches along the way getting my Windows machine to recognize the phone (all of the stupid Motorola tools and the seem editor are Windows apps), but once I did I was downloading the pictures off my phone over bluetooth in less than 5 minutes.

Now I can upload pictures from yesterday's Circus Rave. I am so fucking 1337, I'm going to go h@x0r the Gibson now.

The Circle of Cell Phone Service

I've had one or two cell phones and carriers in my day:

• 1995 - NYNEX Mobile/Bell Atlantic-NYNEX Mobile/Bell Atlantic Mobile
• 1996 - Cellular One
• 1997-1999 - Hiatus
• 2000 - Nextel
• 2002 - AT&T Wireless
• 2004 - T-Mobile
• 2006 - Verizon

A funny pattern for a man who refuses to sign a two year contract.

After ongoing service problems with T-Mobile here in Fairfax City (though they rock in DC proper) I ordered a new Verizon phone and service through Amazon last night (they have, by far, the best deals going). It should be here before the weekend.

It should only take a month or two before I hate them. After all, I only worked there six weeks before I hated it.

Mi Telephono es muy bustido

My mobile phone -- which was on the fritz yesterday -- has finally died. I just replaced my phone less than three months ago, and here I am on hold with T-Mobile trying to get it switched out. I was planning to move over to Verizon for a year, but I hate all their phones (including the new Razr, which they've crippled). I'm also not keen on going back to Cingular, I hated them when they were AT&T mobile.

The other reason I'm not using the opporunity to switch to another provider is that I can't find a phone on the market here in the US that doesn't make me gag. They're aweful and they look like they were designed by retards.

This is the email (no one will read) that I sent T-Mobile:

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I just wanted to make it known how unhappy I am at the moment with T-Mobile, and that I am shopping for a new carrier. My phone has died for the second time in three months, and I'm again in the situation where I'm without a phone for only five days if I pay the extra $15 for "expedited" shipping. When I was with AT&T Wireless, horrid though they were, that $15 had the phone to me in 2 days tops but more likely the next day (including Saturday delivery).

I made the decision when I moved in April to forgoe a home phone and use my mobile instead. That, however, has not gone well since the service covereage here in Fairfax (a full 15 miles from Washington, DC) is fair at best. I logged a service ticket in September and was told upgrades were planned over the next six months, and within a week got a mailer saying that upgrades had been performed in the area and you were working to improve service. Four months later, have you seen my extra bars of coverage, becase my office (which is at George Mason University, 1 mile from my house) has zero coverage at all.

To add insult to injury, the website performance has been horrible the last month or so, and today when I called in to get my phone replaced I waited almost 10 minutes for a customer service rep who transferred me to support, I waited another 10 minutes for someone to pick up there, he asked me the same question the customer rep did and put me back in queue another 10 minutes for I spoke to someone who could get my phone replaced. I spent 30 minutes on the phone when I should have been able to go online, fill out a form ("my phone doesn't turn on") and have a new phone shipped to my house in 1-2 days for my expedited shipping fee, not 5 days.

Is any carrier better? Probably not, but I still don't have to like it. Not at all impressed.

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So don't bother calling or text messaging me until next Wednesday, unless it's at work.