Friday, January 12, 2007

Micronations make my head hurt

In her attempt to kill me with an aneurism today, Mary made a reference to Sealand, a micronation:

The Principality of Sealand is a man-made off-shore installation named HM Fort Roughs, a former Maunsell Sea Fort located in the North Sea 10 kilometres (six miles) off the coast of Suffolk, England, as well as territorial waters in a twelve-nautical-mile radius.

Since 1967, the population of Sealand has consisted of the associates and family members of Paddy Roy Bates, a former radio broadcaster and former British Army Major. Critics claim that Roughs Tower has always remained the property of the United Kingdom, a view that is disputed by the Bates family. The population of the facility rarely exceeds ten, and its area is 5920 sq. ft.

Sealand's claims to sovereignty and legitimacy are not recognised by any country, yet it is sometimes cited[1] in debates as an interesting case study of how various principles of international law can be applied to a territorial dispute. a British DJ squatted on what is essentially an oil rig platform (but built for port defense in WWII), fought off the British Navy with a shot gun, and crowned himself price?

Do what??

While I desperately plugged my ears to keep my leaking brains from spilling out, Mary continued to look at micronations until she ran across the Gay and Lesbian Kingdom of the Coral Sea Islands:

On June 14, 2004, the group claimed the Coral Sea Island Territory and seceded from Australia after sailing to the largest island in the group and raising the rainbow flag there. One of the group's members, Dale Parker Anderson (born 1965), was declared Emperor, as Dale I. The "secession" was staged in protest at a decision to ban same-sex marriage made by the Australian federal parliament.

Since 2005 the Australian group has reportedly been embroiled in internal disputes and secessions by various factions. These include two American-based groups, the Gay and Lesbian Commonwealth Kingdom, headed by Jaix Broox, the Unified Gay Tribe, led by Bill Freeman and Enrique PĂ©rez, and the German based Gay Homeland Foundation led by Victor Zimmermann. None of these other groups claim the territory of the Coral Sea Islands.

The kingdom's claims are not recognised by any state, and as no permanent settlement has been established, the Coral Sea Islands remain uninhabited. The kingdom claims to have begun operating a mail service on January 1, 2006. It is presumed this service operates between the Coral Sea Islands and Queensland, however as of July 2006 there is no independent verification of its precise nature and frequency. The kingdom issued its first stamps in July 2006, and intends to issue stamps conservatively "with the aim of creating a high and distinctive reputation amongst the philatelic fraternity." The kingdom's website asserts that tourism, fishing and philatelic sales are its only economic activities.


Are you kidding me? Here are their stamps:

My favorite are the circle-symbols: man & woman, man & man, woman & woman, and a fucking tranny.

Christ. A tranny stamp. But wait, there's more. Here is the bio of their emperor:

His Imperial Majesty the Emperor
Born in August 1965, Dale Parker Anderson is the eldest of identical twins and is the 19 x great grandson of King Edward II of England (the gay King) and Queen Isabella of France via their son King Edward III. The Emperors Imperial Standard carries the royal arms of England and France.

Yes, you read correctly. "The gay king".

Don't get me wrong. I don't care that it's a homo nation, I care that's it a psuedo-sovereign nation of fucking nutbags. I wish all the LARPers would move to their own island so we could blow that up.


mere said...

i think we should dump cartons of my book on them, make them redo my footnotes in bluebook format without the bluebook, and then set up a moot court competition, where they argue the connections between the tranny stamp, GMOs, and international law. all with me, the lesbian big bang, as the arbitrator.

Kristin said...

Wait... I've got it! I've been talking about establishing an island for menopausal women, where they can go and be batshit insane while they're going through menopause without hurting their loved ones or driving away their best employees! This would be perfect!!! I'm going to build a pirate ship of menopausal women, then sail over to Sealand and execute a hostile take-over. I won't have to lift a finger!!! This is great!!! Then, I'll leave a few rations of chocolate and red wine for each of them and they'll be able to live out their menopausal days until they're ready to re-enter society. I'll win the Nobel Peace Prize for having restored order to the world - it's gonna be great. Why do I keep thinking of the movie 28 Days Later?