Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Tu eres un gringo estupido, y un grande juede bastardo, senor

One of the women who works at the Jazzman's I get my morning coffee from is obviously of Hispanic descent, but what truely surprises me is the number of dumb crackers who try and speak Spanish to her on a daily basis.

It would be one thing if her English was bad and they were trying to meet her in the middle, but honestly her English is very very good.

Today for example, some dude is talking about how they don't have music on because they're closing for the semester today, and he's like "Donde esta la musica?" But then even better, the Colombian Supreme coffee is out, so he decides to tell her "El Supremo de Colombia" is out with the nastiest Winchester, VA Spanish accent I've ever heard.


If I were living in South America working a coffee stand, and some Hispanic dude came up to me and was like "you must are be good nice douche tray", there's no fucking way I'd be all "HAHAHAHAHA tu eres un persona muy intelegente y divertido y muy muy guapo senor". I'd gesture for the dude to come closer, then I'd rape him with the steam arm on the expresso machine until he realized he should just shut his face and put his 11 Sweet and Lows in his coffee and just walk away.

Just walk away fuck face.

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