Wednesday, February 01, 2006

All I need to know about SOTU I learned from Ana Marie Cox

Ana Marie Cox, the original Wonkette (and queen of ass-fucking metaphors) did a guest liveblogging spot for Wonkette last night in parody of ABC's attempt at liveblogging. A couple of her finer moments:
8:57 PM Arresting Cindy Sheehan. So best. Not clear what they arrested her for, but I trust they’ve been listening to their phone calls and therefore know better than us.

9:02 PM The Veterans Affairs guy is the one assigned to stay away tonight. Seeing as how he’s the one of the ones demonstrably not doing his job, great planning.

9:03 PM Alito totally had his robe ready. Was trying it on in his bedroom a week ago. Fuck, a month ago.

9:56 PM John Roberts (the non CBS one): So hot. And I mean that literally. Those robes look very warm.

9:57 PM “Tonight I ask you to pass legislation to prohibit the most egregious abuses of medical research – human cloning in all its forms … creating or implanting embryos for experiments … creating human-animal hybrids” OMG HUMAN-ANIMAL HYBRIDS! BUSH SAYS NO TO WEREWOLVES. HEAR THAT CONGRESS? The man is taking a stand. To repeat: Hybrid cars: Good. Hybrid human-animals: Bad.

Ana's blog also has a diagram of the seating chart for the First Lady's box, which includes Rex the dog:

UPDATE: Rex as positioned in the SEATING CHART: GUESTS IN THE FIRST LADY'S BOX FOR THE 2006 STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS. You have to wonder what protocol officer got stuck with this particular chore. ("Now, do you put the dog next to the Afghani National Assemblywoman? What about the Sudanese widow? I know, teacher of the year...") They wound up sticking him on the stairs. Some honor.

Clearly I missed nothing. Wake me up when it's January 2009.

No comments: